Zoe was one-and-a-half when she started preschool in 2022. I remember the moment we got the email offering us a spot, and how caught off guard we were. It was a very well-respected and popular daycare / preschool and we loved it when we toured. We signed up on the wait list thinking it would be a year before she'd get in, if at all. But literally two weeks after we were waitlisted, we received the message and had 24 hours to decide. It was now or never--we accept, or get moved to the bottom again. We decided to pull the trigger, and just like that, our little girl was going to school.
The morning of her first day of school, Zoe was quite the deer-in-the-headlights. We prepared her as best as we could with reading books about school and discussing it with her. We were advised to make the drop-off quick and casual, and to assure her simply that we will be back to pick her up. We did what we were told, and it was so fast that we were left equally as dumbfounded as she was. But we knew that it was a good place with a wholesome philosophy, clean and well-curated materials, and all that. So we just left her there, to fend for herself. Our little baby. I'm sure that she was mesmerized by it all, people-watching and snack-eating were some of her favorite things to do. While I don't remember how she reacted when we went to pick her up, I won't ever forget how much I looked forward to that moment every day for the next four years. She cried when we dropped her off for the next two weeks, which of course made us feel terrible, but then, she was always busy and enjoying herself when we went to get her. She quickly became very close to her teachers and loved talking about them every day when she came home from school, asking for them sometimes over the weekend. We also became close to many of the families there, and to this day, still continue to meet and plan things together. She learned life's first lessons in trusting in herself, and also the strength in leaning on others, in community. We had the honor of re-learning those same lessons, as her parents.
In all of her years there (80% of her life!), Zoe grew into her identity. She went from being unsure and cautious to confident and outgoing. Her favorite things included: swings, scooters, and sand. She loved to use her imagination, ask questions, and talk--talk, talk, talk. She seemed to get along with everyone, though she was always quite the judgmental little human. She never did grow out of her cautiousness and observant behavior, though. It was funny because she always kept track of who was following the rules and who wasn't--kids and teachers alike. I still remember how she let us know that Ms. E parked in the handicap spot one time, and that Ms. G accidentally said the "S" word once. She knows more about teachers' habits than they think--telling us that Ms. A was picking their fake nails off, or Ms. C picked her nose and didn't wash her hands after. Despite being a little policewoman, she had tons of charisma and captured the hearts of every adult. In her younger years, she liked to chat with or help teachers and therapists more than being with other kids. She had no problem approaching any new adult and asking what their name was and introducing herself, and then introducing us when we went to pick her up. She also knew all of the parents' names and would warmly greet them when they arrived. When she got older, she started to form actual friendships with the kids, getting dirtier, sillier, a bit more fierce. She always was expressive with her words, but when she learned how to read and write, she wrote her heart out and committed those words to paper. Making cards, lists, tickets, and books became her daily obsession, we loved seeing what she had made in her cubby at the end of each day. Standing back, we see how far she has grown and how far she has come, with all of the people who have touched her heart in preschool.
Her graduation was in May of this year, and though I didn't cry at the ceremony, I cried in the days leading up to it, just thinking about her moving on and closing this chapter. It was a beautiful chapter for her and us, too. She learned so much about the world there, but most importantly, she learned that she was seen, heard, loved, and valued by a warm circle of people outside of her own home. We had so many great conversations together about growth, people, differences, change, exceptions, expectations, fear, bravery, independence. It's crazy to think that I have very few memories of my own life before the age of five, so when Zoe gets older she will most likely have forgotten about her time here (even though all of it is so fresh and clear now). That is partly why I wanted to write this post (and all of my posts), so she will be able to read this and see how impactful this time was. She developed a love of making books this year and loves when I make them for her too, so I gifted her a book for graduation that I made about her whole preschool journey. It will be a keepsake for her, along with the sparkly red and gold graduation lei, diploma, tassel, and program. Please note: we never told her that she needed to be rich when she grows up--she must have picked that up somewhere! Makes total sense, though.
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